Hot Coffee

I'm sitting here in the kitchen on a a cold and dreary Saturday morning waiting for my cup of coffee to finish brewing. This may be the first time in a really long time that my coffee will still be warm, sorry, HOT by the time I get to it! I started thinking about how life before Liam was so much more simple and easy and it almost made me miss those times - almost.

Those simple and easy days were consumed with selfishness. It was all about me, about what I wanted to do and what I wanted to have. Not that I'm that much different now than I was then, but man have things changed for me over the last year. I've heard the cliche a million times over the last couple of years - "a baby changes everything" - and for those of you who have said that (including myself to others), there's no way that anyone without kids yet can comprehend what that little statement means. You have your imagination to help you out, but nothing you can imaging compares to the reality of it.

This morning for example, Dusty and I played paper-rock-scissors to see who was going to get up with Liam at 8:30am. Liam won't sleep past 8:30am. I won and didn't wake up until 10am. I don't get to sleep in every Saturday. Usually we take turns. But on the mornings when I do have to get up, it takes everything in me suck up my selfishness and stop the "woe is me" thoughts from running through my head. I'm thankful that in this little way, God is helping me to learn that there are things in life so much bigger than me. Does it suck that I have to get up those mornings? Yes, but seeing my little baby smile at me when I walk into his room to pull him out of his crib makes me forget how tired I am.

It's easy for me to become annoyed when the things I want to do during the day are interrupted by a baby, but when I stop what I'm doing and spend my time with Liam I realize that this is what makes life worth living. Not more computer time, not magazines, not sleep. Spending time investing in his life will produce more fruit that me investing more in myself.